Funny Converstions With Dad Not Twetts
James Breakwell, who is a blogger based in Indianapolis is considered to be the funniest dad on Twitter by some people. Wondering why? He often tweets his daily conversation with his four lovey daughters all under the age of six. His Twitter account XplodingUnicorn has over 429k and his daughters truly love the attention they are getting.
"They like what I do on Twitter mainly because it's all about them. On one hand, Twitter makes me a better father because I spend more time with my kids. On the other hand, Twitter makes me a much worse father because I only do it to get more material," Breakwell told Buzzfeed. "
Take a look at the series of these tweets, it's indeed funny!
— Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) April 23, 20165-year-old: My putty is hard
Wife: When you don't use something for a long time, it gets stiff
Me: *looks up*
Wife: Don't you dare say it
— Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) April 23, 2016Me: Sit there until you finish your lunch.
5-year-old: Fine!
*food gets cold*
*sun sets*
*world ends*
— Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) April 23, 2016Me: How much cereal do you want?
3-year-old: More.
Me: *pours*
3: MORE!
[later]
Me: You didn't eat any of it.
3: You gave me too much.
— Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) April 22, 20165-year-old: *dressed as Elsa* Zap! You're frozen.
Me: I don't have time to play right now
Wife: Take out the trash
Me: Can't. I'm frozen.
— Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) April 22, 2016Me: Can you come over here, princess?
5-year-old: Dad! I'm too old to be a princess!
Me: Then what should I call you?
5: The queen.
— Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) April 22, 2016[leaving home]
5-year-old: There's a slug blocking the door!
Me: It's harmless
5: Then you move it
Me:
5:
Me: Everybody out the window
— Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) April 21, 2016Me: *ends a phone call*
5-year-old: Who was that?
Me: My boss. He just wanted to pick my brain.
5: Is he a zombie?
— Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) April 21, 20163-year-old: There's something wrong with this soap.
Me: What?
3: It tastes funny.
Sounds like user error.
— Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) April 21, 20163-year-old: Why do you always carry the baby?
Me: She can't walk yet.
3: I think she's just lazy.
Busted.
— Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) April 20, 20163-year-old: How much will you grow by your next birthday?
Me: Adults stop growing.
3: So you don't get older?
Me: Well, your mom doesn't.
— Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) April 20, 2016[watching a random cartoon with the kids]
Me: Why is the dog flying a helicopter?
3-year-old: Because he's a dog.
Well, that explains it.
— Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) April 20, 2016Me: Eat your vegetables. They make you grow.
5-year-old: But Mom said I'm growing up too fast.
I'm raising a lawyer.
— Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) April 19, 2016[floor is covered in water]
Me: I told you not to play in the sink!
3-year-old: I didn't!
Me:
3: It's from the toilet.
— Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) April 19, 20165-year-old: What's puberty?
Me: It's when your body goes through changes.
5: Is that when I'll get my ice powers?
— Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) April 18, 2016Me: Where did the grapes go?
Toddler: *sits there innocently with suspiciously chubby cheeks*
Me: For the last time, you're not a hamster.
— Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) April 18, 20165-year-old: I drew a llamaman.
Me: What's that?
5: *rolls her eyes* A man who's a llama, Dad.
I have so much to learn about everything.
— Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) April 17, 2016Toddler: *spills an entire bowl of popcorn and then eats it off the floor*
5-year-old: Stop it!
Me: Let her go. I don't want to vacuum.
— Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) April 16, 20163-year-old: Our house isn't very fast.
Me: It's a house. It doesn't move at all.
3: We should get a faster one.
— Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) April 15, 20163-year-old daughter: A boy at daycare said he likes me.
Me: Do you like him back?
3: He colors outside the lines. He needs to grow up.
— Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) April 14, 2016Me: You forgot to brush your teeth. They're going to fall out.
5-year-old: That's the point.
That tooth fairy story backfired.
(Photo: Twitter/ XplodingUnicorn)
(Photo: Twitter/ XplodingUnicorn)
(Photo: Twitter/ XplodingUnicorn)
(Photo: Twitter/ XplodingUnicorn)
(Photo: Twitter/ XplodingUnicorn)
(Photo: Twitter/ XplodingUnicorn)
(Photo: Twitter/ XplodingUnicorn)
(Photo: Twitter/ XplodingUnicorn)
(Photo: Twitter/ XplodingUnicorn)
(Photo: Twitter/ XplodingUnicorn)
(Photo: Twitter/ XplodingUnicorn)
(Photo: Twitter/ XplodingUnicorn)
(Photo: Twitter/ XplodingUnicorn)
(Photo: Twitter/ XplodingUnicorn)
(Photo: Twitter/ XplodingUnicorn)
(Photo: Twitter/ XplodingUnicorn)
(Photo: Twitter/ XplodingUnicorn)
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Source: https://www.deccanchronicle.com/lifestyle/viral-and-trending/240416/dad-tweets-hilarious-conversation-that-he-has-with-his-four-daughters.html
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